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Thread: Americans, Canadians, Brits and Aussies

  1. #1
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    Americans, Canadians, Brits and Aussies

    Let the flaming begin



    Americans, Aussies, Brits and Canadians.

    Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad.

    Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when abroad.

    Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.

    Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.

    ***

    Aussies: Believe you should look out for your mates.

    Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong to your club.

    Americans: Believe that people should look out for & take care of themselves.

    Canadians: Believe that that's the government's job.

    ***

    Aussies: Are extremely patriotic to their beer.

    Americans: Are flag-waving, anthem-singing, and obsessively patriotic to the point of blindness.

    Canadians: Can't agree on the words to their anthem, when they can be bothered to sing them.

    Brits: Do not sing at all but prefer a large brass band to perform the anthem.

    ***

    Americans: Spend most of their lives glued to the idiot box.

    Canadians: Don't, but only because they can't get more American channels.

    Brits: Pay a tax just so they can watch four channels.

    Aussies: Export all their crappy programs, which no one there watches, to Britain, where everybody loves them.

    ***

    Americans: Will jabber on incessantly about football, baseball and basketball.

    Brits: Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer, and rugby.

    Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey, hockey and how they beat the Americans twice at baseball.

    Aussies: Will jabber on incessantly about how they beat the Poms in every sport they play them in.

    ***

    Americans: Spell words differently, but still call it "English."

    Brits: Pronounce their words differently, but still call it "English."

    Canadians: Spell like Brits, pronounce like Americans.

    Aussies: Add "G'day," "mate" and a heavy accent to everything they say in an attempt to get laid.

    ***

    Brits: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an island.

    Aussies: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an island.

    Americans: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas and liquor in a backwards country.

    Canadians: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas and liquor in a backwards country.

    ***

    Americans: Drink weak, urine-tasting beer.

    Canadians: Drink strong, urine-tasting beer.

    Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting urine.

    Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.

    ***

    Americans: Seem to think that poverty and failure are morally suspect.

    Canadians: Seem to believe that wealth and success are morally suspect.

    Brits: Seem to believe that wealth, poverty, success and failure are inherited things.

    Aussies: Seem to think that none of this matters after several beers.

  2. #2
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    These are pretty funny, and in many cases very true

  3. #3
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    Good stuff.
    [O o)O=\x/=O(o O]

    The things we do for girls who won't sleep with us.

    Patrick says:
    dads is too long so it wont fit
    so i took hers out
    and put mine in

  4. #4
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    isnt it all about west virginia?
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    im offended!!!
    badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger

  5. #5
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    dude!!this is so funny and true !!!!!!!!!!!!!funnyyyyyyyy!
    Some Rulers Are Immortalized In Marble Others,
    In Carbon Fiber.{Hard Core Audi Fan}Ich Fahr Omnibus!
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  6. #6
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    extremely subjective
    UCP's NO. 1 Source for Enzo & 69 Camaro pic's

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by werty
    extremely subjective
    Care to expand on that?

  8. #8
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    Mostly true, not in my case, but whats funny is most are easily observable!
    Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin
    OBSESSED is a word the lazy use to describe the DEDICATED!

  9. #9
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    lol i saw that on ebaums..... hilarious and true
    Andreas Preuninger, Manager of Porsche High Performance Cars: "Grandmas can use paddles. They aren't challenging."

  10. #10
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    I would be angry if most of those weren't true.....
    pondering things

  11. #11
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    Looks like the Aussies win!
    < 1 - 2 - to the bass >

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by kko
    Looks like the Aussies win!
    only because we're drunk
    Andreas Preuninger, Manager of Porsche High Performance Cars: "Grandmas can use paddles. They aren't challenging."

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Egg Nog
    Care to expand on that?
    nope
    UCP's NO. 1 Source for Enzo & 69 Camaro pic's

  14. #14
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    funny how the mods cant get banned for something like this

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by ZemoButts
    funny how the mods cant get banned for something like this
    Why would Niko or anyone else be banned for this??? He's not attacking anyone, just poking some (mostly true) fun at everyone.
    "NEVER ALLOW SOMEONE TO BE YOUR PRIORITY, WHILE ALLOWING YOURSELF TO BE THEIR OPTION"

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