Favourite Top Gear qoutes/rants....

[Clique]

one of ma favourite conversations is where the 3 are talking about men not being able to drive convertibles..i cant remember how it goes but its something like this:

JC: I don't think any man can drive a convertible.
JM: I'm sorry. I hate to interrupt this, but this is honestly the biggest load of limp-wristed twaddle I've ever heard. These two, they're not real men. Hammond here wakes up every morning and sticks his head in a bucket of hair product. He has got a dog, but it's a poodle. And you can stop laughing, Clarkson, because you won't drink brown beer and you say "Eeeugh, flatulence isn't funny" when clearly it is! I am in fact the only proper man on this show. I live in a tumble-down house full of motorbikes, and and I think a bloke can drive a convertible. But it's got to be the right kind.

it be fun having a thread on the funny qoutes abit like the jokes thread...

[d-quik]

i dont know about quotes or rants but in terms of favourite MOMENTS it has to be when they got rid of tiff.. or more specifically tiff's VOICE!

[Cotterik]

haha very true, he emphasises the ending of every sentance he speaks with an added touch of 'motoring masculinity' even more so than clarkson

[Bugarse]

I like the bit when JC is testing a Zonda and gives smile to the camera as he says "I'm changing out of fifth gear now... and into top gear"

[bmwpower]

I loosely quote the G55 AMG episode as it was being driven by the young guy with the whitened teeth

"Putting a race inspired engine like this in an SUV is as odd a combination as an 83 year old millionaire marrying a 23 year old pole dancer, but either way you know with both your gonna have one helluva a time"

I loosely quote becuase that episode was seen ages ago..but i still remeber surprisingly well..That's the official greatest quote, but we should turn this thread into a vote..

[Clique]

Pedestrian: Is it a kit car?
JM: Is it a kit car....Philistine...

[VtecMini]

Pedestrian: Is it a kit car?
JM: Is it a kit car....Philistine...

Lol, that one was cool.

My fave was JC in the Clio V6.

[Whilst pirouetting off the track]

"I think the problem is that it's French, it's a surrender-monkey".

[2ndclasscitizen]

Pedestrian: Is it a kit car?
JM: Is it a kit car....Philistine...

From the same episode:

JC: Yes, I was hoping to end the night in quite a different sort of hedge

[kingofthering]

Clarkson reading plaque on Ford GT- built by hmm.. (reads) well, it was built by ken and (other guy)

[Pando]

One of my favourite ones:

"You may think we're only into solid gold Lamborghini's and Ferrari's with jet engines....

.. and You'd be right"

[DesmoRob]

My favourite is when Clarkson tests the M5 and is constantly interrupted by the female computer voice informing him of random pointlessness. I haven't seen many topgear as I don't ever watch tv and when I do it's never on, so I only search the net for them. But of the ones I have seen, that stood out to me because it was funny seeing ol' Jer get so fed up lol.

[h00t_h00t]

Hammond: "...And you can find out if I died later on!"

[2ndclasscitizen]

JC: "We've been told we need to feature more green cars. So here you go (points to lime green Murcie). It's about the greenest car we good find"

and from the Winter Olympics special: Hammond "We are in fact at the cutting edge of cocking about"

[kingofthering]

clarkson- Geronimo!
Clarkson when he crashed his volvo with the broken speedo at 40 instead of the 30.

[Lagonda]

"Powerrrrr!!!!!!"

I find myself shouting this when I push my car hard.